Christian Men's Fashion Show High in Polyester

It's a miracle—fabric, that is.

NSPIRED BY the Lord and Heidi Klum's Project Runway, a group of Christian men last evening launched their first runway show, entitled "Mysterious Ways," right next door to New York City's famed Bryant Park, in what is actually an adjacent doggie run.

Said organizer Patrick Dixon, "We wanted people to know that just because we're heterosexual, family-loving, church-going, bible-reading Christian men, that does not mean we don't have a sense of fashion. And, like our Lord Jesus Christ, we wanted our first show to appear in a humble location, among the animals."

Mr. Dixon said the choice of polyester "as our guiding fabric" came to him in a dream.

"Jesus walked right up to me in the Sear's Men's department, where I work in real life, and said, 'Do you have anything in a 32 short?' I pulled a pair of polyester slacks off the rack in front of me. Next thing I knew, they fit Him perfectly! I called my prayer buddy the next morning and told him the Good News."

"Mysterious Ways" did not receive any newspaper reviews, despite its proximity to Bryant Park. However, it did get a write-up in Mr. Dixon's Sunday church bulletin.

"Mrs. Joseph Pratt gave us a very nice mention, God bless her," confirmed Mr. Dixon. "Although she may have to recuse herself, being a really big fan of anything polyester."

All fashions shown on the runway are for sale "at very reasonable prices," said Mr. Dixon. Among the pieces described in the show's catalog include dress shirts "hand-stamped with bold paisleys that say, 'Hi there, I'm a friendly guy'"; a number of leisure suits "in a nod to the 70s"; hats that can easily squish into a fanny pack; and, appropriately, fanny packs, "in a wide array of attractive, fashion-forward colors, such as traffic-light green."

The showcase piece, a maroon polyester tuxedo "for very special occasions," is the most expensive item, selling for $219.95.

"That's less than you would spend for a tux at Sears," said Mr. Dixon. "God's honest truth."