Call Intensifies for Orly Taitz to Release Her Long-Form EEG

Brain activity inconclusive in videos of Birther queen, say some observers.

RDENT BIRTHER Orly Taitz—finding herself under similar pressure to what President Obama has experienced with regard to his Hawaiian birth certificate—is fielding an increasing number and intensity of calls for the release of the so-called long form of her EEG.

According to an editorial in the most recent issue of Brainers, named after an affiliation of Americans who believe that Orly Taitz is actually a zombie, the video evidence of Ms. Taitz's various appearances on television and at rallies "falls laughably short" of providing solid proof "that Orly Taitz is actually a sentient human being and not really a zombie with lots of black eye makeup and goofy hair."

Brainers have become even more convinced of the need for a long-form EEG of the Birther queen's brain activity since her bizarre behavior in an appearance last week on MSNBC's The Last Word, hosted by Lawrence O'Donnell.

"A living human being with brain wave activity would not have rattled off a spate of meaningless noises as Ms. Taitz did with Lawrence O'Donnell," the editorial went on to say.

"We believe the reason Mr. O'Donnell cut off his guest so abruptly was that she was on the brink of eating his nose in a fit of zombie rage," continued the editorial. "Although some in journalism might consider interviewing a zombie quite a coup, Mr. O'Donnell did well to stop the loss of one of the most attractive noses in television."

Brainers is also now insisting that Orly Taitz, a name they are calling "a zombie anagram if we ever saw one," be videotaped while receiving an EEG "for a minimum of several minutes, to account for fluke readings," and that several impartial witnesses, including a physician, be present in the room as the test is being administered.

"It would be quite easy to fake an EEG on a zombie," said a Brainers editor. "We need to verify that the brain waves coming out of the machine are indeed that of Ms. Taitz and not simply a prerecorded EEG of a living person with functioning grey matter."

When asked if a verifiable, long-form EEG from Ms. Taitz would satisfy Brainers that the Birther was a living human being with a normal brain, the editor paused, then replied, "Yes, I suppose, if you're willing to entertain the realm of science fiction."