Barack Obama Is the Lizard King. He Can Do Anything.

Upon hearing the news, Biden continues grinning from ear to ear, so it's kind of hard to tell what he really makes of it.

photo credit: Furryscaly

RESIDENT BARACK OBAMA strode to the bank of microphones in the White House Rose Garden yesterday morning dressed in his custom-tailored, Jim Morrison-inspired Lizard King super-hero tights and cape.

"I know what you may be thinking," said the President, holding up his hand to quell the surge of reporters' questions, "but the Jib Jab outfit was not my inspiration," referring to the Barack Obama super-hero cartoon Jib Jab artists presented at the White House Correspondents' Dinner last week.

Continued the President, "I've been thinking about the Lizard King since I took office, so my presence before you here today in my tights and cape is sheerly a coincidence with Jib Jab. I only wish I had made my decision sooner." A light breeze lifted the president's bright green cape, as if a lizard tail were swaying back and forth.

NBC's David Gregory shot up out of his seat to ask the first question of the press conference.

"How will your foreign policy change, Mr. President, now that you are the Lizard King?"

"Well, David," said the President, placing his hands on his hips, "I believe that my mere presence will act as a deterrent to rogue nations, much as Superman's kept a lid on mob behavior in Metropolis. That is, when Lois and Jimmy didn't get their noses in too deep," chuckled President Lizard King Obama.

"Mr. President," veteran reporter Helen Thomas asked wearily, "why do you think wearing tights and a cape and that lizard insignia could possibly be of any use to the United States as we face a host of crises? And, sir, if I could follow up, won't this be nothing but a complete embarrassment for our nation around the world?"

President Obama, gazing tolerantly down at Ms. Thomas, replied, "Well, Helen, with all due respect, I think you may not be familiar with Jim Morrison's best work, am I right?"

"Yes, Mr. President, you are correct. But what—"

"Helen, please, if I may. Jim Morrison, frontman for The Doors, and whose drug and alcohol use I do not condone, said once, 'I am the Lizard King, I can do anything.' I think that's something we can all believe in, and therefore, it will be my new catch phrase, replacing 'Change we can believe in,' or 'Make it happen,' or whatever my old catch phrase was.

"Anyway. It will also be my new outfit. I will wear it proudly, and I will wear it often. I will do my best to look good in it. That is my responsibility. I am today's Lizard King, and I, too, can do anything. With total props to Jimbo, of course."