Nation credited with bringing new life to a disease once thought eliminated within its borders.
HE WORLD HEALTH Organization (WHO) announced today that the United States had earned the prestigious Jenny McCarthy Medical Ignorance Award over its recent outbreak of measles that has now spread to fourteen states.
The first-world nation beat out all third-world countries because of "its commitment to allowing the ignorance of pop-culture icons such as Jenny McCarthy to set the standard for discourse on a topic as fundamental to public health as vaccinations," said WHO in its announcement.
Many pundits had predicted Sierra Leone would win this year's honor for having allowed funeral practices that actually put more of its citizens at risk of contracting the deadly Ebola virus. However, WHO said the United States deserved the award more "for having come so far and then retreating back into medical ignorance thanks to one hot blonde and a lot of talk shows and CNN anchors."
A WHO spokeswoman said the award was named in honor of Ms. McCarthy "for her daring one-woman campaign against vaccinations in the United States," which had contained many serious childhood illnesses, and in some cases eliminated disease altogether, "until the comic actress took it upon herself to shake things up a bit."
Citing the actress's use of her son as proof that vaccinations could cause autism, members of WHO's awards panel said "the personal touch combined with medical ignorance was the deciding factor in naming our latest prestigious award after this talented and uniquely ignorant woman."
McCarthy's agent refused to comment on specifics, but did say that the actress "was honored to have an award named after her by a health organization with such an easy acronym to remember for future attacks on medical science."
© 2.3.15 Kate Heidel